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Friday, April 17, 2009

I believe I have much to apologise for.

To whoever who thought that I was talking about, I'm sorry for being insensitive to your feelings. Tho fact is I wasn't pin pointing at anyone, but just generally speaking about my irks that happen to be of significance this very year. Still, should have been a little more knowing and aware about people's feelings so. yes sorry. Really.

I'm thankful for 2 very important people in my life and I wish that they'll be with me for life.

and I'll start being nicer whenever I can to one of the two becos I've been very mean to him.

also, I'll remember to practise empathy whenever I'm being critical becos my head doesn't sync very well with my feelings when I'm pissed off/irritated.

smack me if I don't.

by some arabian girl :)
19:42


Friday, April 03, 2009

It's hard to stay in top form. Just need to rant, need people to know. I'm very scared for our choir's syf. Expectations that don't come from others just impacts more. It's not like we're going to sing to compete, but having the passion to sing gives you the urge to sing well, and when you don't.. yknow. everything just stops short.

I dno. Everything in my head's going in circles and I can't think straight, hence this superbly incoherent entry. (supposed to be doing PI). Need some silent comforts, need to rethink my thoughts. becos serz, I'm getting quite sick of this. Having to remind others while making every attempt to keep mindful of techniques(which is so fundamental- not musicality, there isn't much joy in every song I sing), trying not to oversing, wdv wdv. Know that it's responsibility and the section (if not choir) has to move as one, but what more can I do when I'm already so frustrated on my own. I don't want to implode just weeks before the big day everyone's harping about. Going to step back into the shadows and let things fall into place. I hope to get my faith back, and that if I believe enough, everything will be alright.

It's just me. I'm a mess. But I'm trying to get back into shape. I want to humble myself: I'm not the strength of a section. Nobody can ever be. (self reminder)

by some arabian girl :)
20:32


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